Category Archives: Personal Growth

Breathe, Reconnect, Think... Then Respond

Breathe, Reconnect, Think… Then Respond

By | Personal Growth | No Comments

Breathe, Reconnect, Think... Then RespondThink before you speak. Think before you act. It’s one of those sayings dealt out to children from the parenting deck of cards. It’s a saying that isn’t usually adopted by anyone and instead reserved for awkward moments of embarrassment or frustration. While it’s 100% good advice it’s actually very very hard to do, especially in a world that is moving faster and faster every.single.day.

It seems as though thinking has given way to reacting.

We react in anger every time someone cuts us off in traffic by yelling out.

We react in frustration every time a line is too long and the person at the front is going too slow. 

We react in defense every time our methods or beliefs or lifestyle is questioned. 

We are a society that does a whole lot of reacting and not a ton of thinking or breathing. And where does this get us? No where. In fact, it puts up walls around our hearts and minds, it fills our spirits with pain and despair, and clouds our vision so we can’t see or connect with anyone or anything around us.

Even though it seems hard to stop from reacting – even though reacting seems immediate and unstoppable – I do believe the old adage is right, it is important to think before you act.

It’s just missing two fundamental steps that need to come first, that can help you pause and take value of yourself, your situation and the world around you: breathing and reconnecting… One deep breath creates space and opportunity, clears your vision, illuminates the entire situation. One moment of reconnection with your heart/mind/soul can help you remember and realign with your true values and purpose.

One deep breath brings light into the darkness, one moment of reconnection brings truth into your being, and one chance to think, to truly think, can help you respond with mindfulness.

For instance, what if we prayed for safe travel for those rushing from one place to the next?

What if we relied on patience and compassion when the line seems to go on forever?

What if we embraced acceptance and understanding when met with new ideas, beliefs and lifestyles?

What if we began breathing, reconnecting, and thinking before doing anything else?

Rather than getting angry/frustrated/defensive every time something goes a little off-course, what if we took a deep breath, reconnected with our heart, and thought about the situation as a whole? What if we realized that not everyone is out to get us, that not everything and everyone is against us, that not every slight is meant to hurt us? What if we realized that we don’t need to rush our response, that there is time for honesty, compassion and mindfulness?

I believe if we began moving a little slower, giving ourselves the time and opportunity to breathe/reconnect/and think we would create ripples of peace and compassion that would change our mindset, our relationships, our day to day lives, and the world as a whole.

Breathe, reconnect, think… then respond.


undefinedErin is known for her radiant energy, bright smile and willingness to get real.

As a Writer, Life Coach and Reiki Guide Erin is dedicated to supporting people in their journey to find clarity, direction and happiness. After moving past her own barriers to happiness she knew that she could help others though the same mindful yet bold approach she used to create a joyful, engaging life. 

She believes in the importance of community, connection, compassion, and a good cup of coffee. 

Connect with her at Creative Soul in MotionErinMadore.com, through Twitter, and Facebook.

88f618f04e27dec0f63e5c1a19e85b96

How to Embrace Change

By | Personal Growth | No Comments

88f618f04e27dec0f63e5c1a19e85b96To say a lot is going on in my life right now is a huge understatement. Let’s see… On Friday, 4/5, I left my full-time HR job so I can focus on my writing, coaching and Reiki business. Then two days later my wonderful boyfriend of 5+ years proposed to me! On top of that, we’re moving from Boston to California at the end of May!

That means that I am currently ::: working on a couple eBooks, redesigning my site, launching a business, planning a wedding, and organizing a cross-country move. Phew, that’s even a lot to say out loud. Now, I know it’s only been a few days, but (at this time) I’m not feeling stressed, overwhelmed or full of anxiety – even though there is a lot to do, and a lot going on.

Instead, every moment, every breath, is full of hope, possibility, love and most of all trust. Trust that I’ve laid a foundation to help me get through all of these changes with grace. Trust that everything will work out. Trust that the universe has my best interests at heart. Trust that everything is part of the journey, the process, the experience of life.

I’m not in denial :: yes there is a lot to do – but I’m also not letting it take over my life. I’m not letting all of this change throw me off balance. I’m not letting the future over-run the present. I also realize that there will be moments where I feel overwhelmed and stressed-out but that’s natural and rather than fighting against it, I’m welcoming it ALL as part of the journey.

So rather than losing my Self in the chaos, or even welcoming chaos into my life, I’m enjoying and navigating all of these changes mindfully.


Here is how I’m running around with my head still attached and a smile on my face:

I’m living and experiencing, not just planning and scheduling.

My life is headed in a new direction and while I may be moving fast I’m not letting the scenery flash by me at lightening speed. Instead, I’m embracing each day, finding the beauty in each moment, savoring time with my loved ones, and generally moving slower. I’m intent on taking in the journey and the ride.

I’m trusting my instincts.

Like “they” say :: planning a wedding is as hard as you make it. Well, I think that goes for all of life actually. Since Josh and I have a lot to do within the next 8 weeks we’re not second-guessing ourselves or putting a ton of time into research and comparison. Instead, we’re figuring out what we need to know and making decisions that feel good to us. Decisions that feel right.

Marie Forleo has an incredible video on how you can tell if you’re following your gut and living in accordance with your core beliefs, values and desires. Check it out here. My biggest take-away :: when something feels “right” for me I’ll feel expansive, open and excited.

I’m relying on self-care and self-love.

Yoga. Running. Meditation. Reiki. Dance. These are all the ways I clear my head, create space in my soul, ground myself, and connect with my true authentic Self. During times of transition it’s easy to forget about self-care and fall back on bad habits, but when I immerse myself in those practices that nourish my mind, body, and soul, I find it easier to be mindful, to live boldly, to make decisions clearly, to move forward confidently. Through movement I find strength and stability.

I’m remembering to laugh, and to smile. 

Those times when things don’t go right. When my schedule falls apart. When the day escapes me. Those are the moments are the times I could clench my hands and shake my fists at my really really long to do list. Instead I laugh. Out loud usually. Big belly laughs. And I smile at the situation, at the moment. It’s not because I’m denying myself the right to be frustrated, or the experience of feeling overwhelmed. It’s because I’m being honest with myself ::: while all of this matters, it doesn’t matter enough to ruin my day or my life.

Change can be overwhelming, frustrating, challenging, scary. That’s normal. But through mindfulness, honesty, and a good sense of humor I’m learning to let go of the fear and anxiety and embrace the waves and tides of change.

Moving, getting married, starting a new business – these are all things I want and have created for myself, so I’m not going to curse the change. Rather, I’m going to enjoy the actual moments of change.

How do you embrace change?


undefinedErin is known for her radiant energy, bright smile and willingness to get real.

As a writer, life coach and Reiki Guide Erin is dedicated to supporting people in their journey to find clarity, direction and happiness. After moving past her own barriers to happiness she knew that she could help others though the same mindful yet bold approach she used to create a joyful, engaging life. Just recently she launched a video series: Creating Careers of Purpose that runs every Friday.

She believes in the importance of community, connection, compassion, and a good cup of coffee. 

Connect with her at Creative Soul in MotionErinMadore.com, through Twitter, and Facebook.

Purpose Driven Life

Are You Living on Purpose?

By | Personal Growth | 4 Comments

Purpose Driven Life

You know you are living on purpose and leading a truly meaningful life when you can honestly tell yourself that you are living these 5 steps.

I have been hearing from clients and others that I have been talking to lately that they are feeling there is a deeper meaning to their life. Is this you as well?

I believe that you are being divinely guided to step into your greatness and what you came here to do. That is why you are feeling that desire to discover this deeper meaning to your life.

Be honest with yourself when you go through these steps. I want you to fully enjoy your life and know that you are making the difference in the world that you were created to make.

1. Listen and follow your heart and intuition

Divine source energy lives in your heart center and guides you from that space. If you are logically trying to figure out what to do in life, you are not following your heart and intuition.

You may receive messages or awareness that makes no sense to you, I urge you to go into your heart and perceive whether that feels light to you. If it does, it aligns with your authentic truth and is a message from your higher self and divine source energy. Trust and have faith and keep a journal of the messages you received, if you followed it and the results that transpired.

Realize that some results take time. Be willing to be in the present moment and be aware of what is showing up for you.

2. Step in to the highest and best version of yourself every moment

Being authentic and truly YOU is the only way to live. If you are not being you, who are you trying to be? You have a unique design, are you aware what that is?

Judy Garland said, “Always be a first rate version of yourself instead of a second rate version of somebody else.”

You are unique with gifts, talents and a message that only you can deliver. Embrace who you are and let go of all your judgments about yourself. The thing that you are most fearful of doing, DO IT NOW! It will move you into a higher version of you.

3. Live a life of gratitude

Happiness is a choice. Your perception of everything that happens in your life is a choice. Choose to view life as it is happening for you and through you instead of to you.

Everything has a gift in it for you. You are the co-creator of your life and your experiences. Seek the gift in everything and choose to be grateful and you will be happier with yourself and your life.

4. Make a difference

You are here to be of service not in servitude. You will fulfill your own divine purpose by serving others with your unique gifts, talents and message.

Strive to make a difference in someone’s day every day. This could simply be sharing a smile with them or by doing something that is greater than you and making a huge positive impact in their life.

The choice is yours but make sure that it feels light and good to you. If you are feeling obligated to do something, it does not align with your truth and you would be better to choose something else.

5. Take full responsibility for your life

Be willing to own the choices you have made in life. Sometimes we make choices that are experiences from which we have grown, learned and developed new skills from.

You are the common denominator in everything that has happened to you. When you own your own choices, you take back your power that you gave away from blaming someone else for your troubles. This will empower you beyond measure.

It is a purpose of mine to raise the awareness and consciousness of women who desire to live a purpose driven life and make a difference in this world. Schedule a Clarity Strategy Session at no cost to you and step into your purpose driven life today.

Be Authentic, BE YOU!

Diane Marie

How to Deal with Bad News at Work

How to Deal with Bad News at Work

By | Personal Growth | 4 Comments

I’ve received a lot of devastating news at work. A lot.

Last year it was at work where I found out my cousin’s 5 year-old daughter was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor, then a week later I was at work when I found out she had passed away.

Just recently I was in my cube when my mother called to tell me my Great Aunt had died. And just a couple weeks ago I was told my friend had a miscarriage one minute before a big meeting.

We cannot plan on receiving bad news and we cannot control it.

We can’t tell our friends and family :: I’m sorry, I’m at work and can’t hear this right now because I have too much to do.

It’s just not how life works. Especially with social media it’s hard to keep personal life and work life separate. And is that even practical or right? Aren’t we living, breathing, feeling human beings regardless of whether we’re at work or home? Yes we are.

I believe we should always be able to recognize and experience our feelings.

Here’s how I’ve learned to cope with emotional rollercoasters of life with grace and authenticity while in my corporate job ::

1. Don’t Ignore Your Feelings.

Acknowledge them. Embrace them. Feel them. Don’t hide them under layers of protective armor – ignoring your feelings will only create a deeper cut, a greater pain, a nagging sensation of loss and frustration. The longer you discount the feelings the greater power they will have over you.

2. Be Honest.

I’ve found that even though it’s a bit awkward to tell other people that you are going through a rough time, it can set clear expectations and create a foundation of understanding and support. A simple email or chat with your manager can warn her of your distress – that way if you’re a bit distracted in a meeting or behind in a project she’ll understand. This can also create a stronger bond between you and your manager – honestly speaking of feelings is scary but is a very courageous and genuine way of being human and professional at the same time.

3. Try to Continue Your Day as You Normally Would (or go home if you can).

This might seem contradictory but even though I encourage you to feel your emotions, I’m not suggesting that you sit in your cube crying or yelling out in pain. If the emotions are that intense it’d probably be best for you to go home where you can openly experience each feeling, but if you’re determined to stay and work through the day try to remember that :: it’s OKAY for you to keep working. Yes, work might not seem as important at that moment but it’s OKAY to stay focused and dedicated to your job, even when you’re heartbroken.

4. Don’t Feel Bad for Feeling Good.

It feels wrong to smile when you’ve just lost someone you love. I understand that. You feel bad for not honoring and respecting their passing. But you can’t stop living your own life. You can’t make yourself miserable and block out all the good that there is in the world.

Minutes after hearing about my Great Aunt I heard that a coworker was pregnant and for a brief second I felt bad for my happiness. I felt bad for being excited about my friend’s good news. Then I realized that my Great Aunt would have been happy for her too. That she wouldn’t want me to ignore the joy around me, even during my time of sadness.

5. Make Time to Grieve.

Even though you’ve been honest with yourself and those around you about what you’re going through, it’s still important to give yourself the space and time to truly embrace your feelings. Time to connect with your sadness, grief, fear, pain, confusion, anger. Time to be honest and raw. Time to let down your guard and be vulnerable.

Once you realize that emotions are natural and meant to be experienced and expressed you take away the negativity and hesitation surrounding them and can be present and honest with yourself and those around you.

Our emotions are beautiful. Even the ones that we wish we didn’t have to feel. It’s all part of life, and by embracing each and every experience we empower ourselves, we strengthen our hearts, we expand our compassion, we increase to our ability to heal, and we grow and flourish.

Erin


undefinedErin is known for her radiant energy, bright smile and willingness to get real.

As a writer, life coach and Reiki Guide Erin is dedicated to supporting people in their journey to find clarity, direction and happiness. After moving past her own barriers to happiness she knew that she could help others though the same mindful yet bold approach she used to create a joyful, engaging life. Just recently she launched a video series: Creating Careers of Purpose that runs every Friday.

She believes in the importance of community, connection, compassion, and a good cup of coffee. 

Connect with her at Creative Soul in MotionErinMadore.com, through Twitter, and Facebook.

actualize your dreams

Are you ready to actualize your dreams?

By | Personal Growth | 3 Comments

actualize your dreamsDo you have a dream that hasn’t manifested yet? 

You can get discouraged if you have a dream, yet it hasn’t come to reality yet.

Maybe you have taken action steps towards it in the past and have gotten burned, disappointed, hurt or had your pride wounded in some way and put it on the back burner.

It’s like a smoldering flame deep down within you.  You want it to be a reality but a part of you is just too darn tired or afraid to take action on it once again.  Yet, it won’t leave you alone.  It just keeps nagging at you.

Have you ever experienced this in your life? 

If you have the dream in your heart and it won’t leave you alone, you were born with that dream and it is part of who you are.

You owe it to yourself and the world to do whatever it takes to fulfill your dreams!

 

I know for me it is my dream of finding the love of my life.  Deep within me I know and feel that there is someone special out there just waiting for us to meet and create our life together!  After almost 26 years of being divorced and single, that dream is still there.

Yes, I have gone through all the emotions, thoughts and feelings of giving up, putting it away and not thinking about this dream.

I used to say, “What is wrong with me?” all the time until I realized that there was nothing wrong with me, that it was I who was standing in my own way from realizing this dream.

You can choose to make that smoldering fire a daily suffering or you can choose to make it a burning desire with purpose, passion and results.

Are you allowing your dream to come into reality?

Sometimes you can create such a stringent container of how you want your dream to show up that you aren’t even aware of what is showing up that are foundational pieces of your dream.

I am not saying that you shouldn’t visualize your dreams as that is important.  What I am saying is when you visualize; allow your consciousness to be aware of the energy of the visualization.  Everything is energy and energy doesn’t lie.

I remember turning down the unconditional love of a man that had all the qualities I visualize the love of my life having.  I couldn’t get past that he wasn’t taller than me because in my mind I saw this person being tall, dark and handsome.  I was locked into that was the way he must show up.

You just might be passing up on some pretty awesome things because they don’t  look exactly like how you visualized them.

By allowing yourself to tap into the energy of your dreams and not be so hung up on what it looks likes in physical presence, you will find yourself bringing more dreams into reality.

When you get out of your own way, allow the energy of God/Spirit/The Universe to work with you instead of you working against it, miracles happen.  You fulfill your dreams, and life becomes fun, exciting and worth living.

Do you have a dream that you haven’t brought into reality yet? 

Are you standing in your own way from realizing that dream? 

What would your life be like if you allowed yourself to be open to all possibilities of actualizing that dream today, next month or this year?

Would you be happier in life with the dream as part of your living reality?   Although I am very happy in life, I know I would be happier with the love of my life in it.  That is why I am making 2013 the year to actualize my dream and the energy of what he will contribute to my life and me to his.

We would love to hear your thoughts about your dreams. Leave us a comment below and feel free to share this post with your family and friends.

BE Authentic, BE YOU!

Diane Marie

 

P.S.  My gift to you is a complimentary dream clarity strategy session.  Your dreams are just waiting for you to bring them into reality.  Don’t let another moment go by.  Click here